Dear Firefighters,

Thank you for your committment to your work and putting yourself in danger to help others! Also, thank you for almost always being a hottie! However, if you are a firefighter and you are not a hottie, advertising that you are a firefighter is NOT going to make you any hotter. Nor is the stuffed fire dog in your rear window, or the sticker that says "Find 'em hot, leave 'em wet." I think I have made myself clear. Thanks!

Whoa Mom! That's A Big Belly!

Yeah, it is and I am sure the gentleman that you are pointing at and referring to would appreciate it if you would move along and so would I! JT not only said this, but did a double-take to do so. We were in a local Mexican restaurant and on the way to the restroom. Therefore, we had to take the same route back to our table. I, of course, was mortified. Once we got to the bathroom I told him that we don't make comments about other people..AT ALL. Apparently, there was something that he misunderstood in that conversation. On our way back to our table...I was even carrying him to hurry things along, he pointed and said "there mom, there!" Um, yeah, I know. SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!

For Fun

1. Go to Photobucket (don't sign in)....I used flickr.

2. Type in your answer to the question in the "search" box

3. Use only the first image

4. Copy the html and paste for the answer.

Your First Name

Your Favorite Color

Celeb Crush

Favorite Disney Princess

Favorite Movie

Favorite Adult Beverage

Dream Vacation

Favorite Dessert

What I wanted to do when I grew up

The Y

I've finally started going back to the Y thanks to Kim. I went to an interval training class on Thursday that I really enjoyed and I plan to do that every T/TH. Darrell and I went to a core and flow class on Fri., which is a combination of pilates and yoga. We both really enjoyed it. There is a group power lift class that takes place after this one that I plan on trying this week. Kim and I met today and walked on the track. I then did a Zumba class. It was very interesting...a lot of mambo and chacha steps. There were a lot of older ladies in there...and it very much reminded me of a hip hop class. That makes for a very funny combination. I had to leave the class early though, the nursery came and got me because Lily June had been crying and wouldn't settle down. This was right in the middle of her naptime and she gets MAD when she is tired!!! Just like her mommy! I am enjoying the Y and I hope I can keep it up!

Oh what fun!

We had a nice weekend! We all went to a campfire at a nearby park on Friday night. It was fun, however, it was a mile hike to the fire (and therefore a mile back). We had smores and sang songs and guessed at riddles. It was fun, but while we were there, Daddio got a bad tummy and had to go to the bathroom. So, he pretty much missed all of the fun.

Saturday was JT's first day at soccer. He is in a program called Ripples, which is basically an introduction to soccer. It is for 3 and 4 yr. olds. He did well...I had no idea he could run and kick the ball at the same time. I was very proud of him. Unfortunately, Daddio had to go into work Friday night and couldn't make it. He was very disappointed, but it wasn't a game and JT didn't even notice (this time).

Sunday we went to Henry's 3rd birthday party. It was at Chuck E. Cheese's. I always like going there because JT has so much fun. Not to mention, the pizza is really good and I can get an endless supply of diet coke.

The Intruder

JT was playing next door with his friend Tori this evening. They were 'helping' her parents plant flowers. Darrell went over there to get him and her stepdad told him that one day when he came home he thought his wife had gotten up early to see him (she's a nurse and works some nights). He saw her peek through the window. When he walked in the house, it wasn't his wife. It was JT sitting there watching TV. He had just busted on into their house! I can just imagine what this guy thought! I am mortified, but at the same time I think it freaking hysterical! Darrell said his mouth dropped open when he told him. Of course Darrell apologized and they didn't care, but OMG...how crazy is that?! I have told him time and time again that he can't just bust into people's houses! He tried to do that while trick-or-treating! What a nut!

I just want some carbs, please!

On my way to meet Kim at the Y this morning (ahem), I stopped by Dunkin' Donuts. I wanted my somewhat usual order of a plain bagel toasted with strawberry cream cheese. I ordered and when I got to the window I was informed that they were out of strawberry cream cheese and asked if I would like something else. Well, they didn't have any other flavors that interested me so I just cancelled my order and left. I was bummed and hungry so I thought I would at least go to McD's and get my diet coke....not with that line! I swear, it's a conspiracy.

I went to the Y and did and interval training class which I really enjoyed. I plan on going again...I need to make it a habit. Well, of course after all that work I was really hungry. After I left the Y I finally got my diet coke and then went back to DD to order my second standby...an english muffin toasted with butter and strawberry jam. "I'm sorry we are out of english muffins and strawberry jam." WTF?? "Would you like a croissant with grape jam?" Well, not really, but since I want bread and sugar and butter, I guess it will have to do. When I got to the window I commented on how they were out of everything. They told it had been that way all week. They were "waiting on a truck". The croissant was ok, but just not what I wanted. At least I got my diet coke...and a workout!

Lost

No, not the TV show. For the third night in a row now JT has told me that he is lost in Tennessee and his friends are lost too. I really need a translator sometimes. He says some of the most random stuff!! Funny, but random!

I am lost because Daddio is still at work and JT cried forever for him tonight. As if I were hiding him somewhere and just telling him he was at work! He doesn't know when he will be home tonight and that means weird hours tomorrow and he also mentioned he will be working Friday night. I HATE THAT! JT has soccer on Sat. morning, so that will be interesting...especially since this is our first practice. The fields were too soggy last week. Wish me luck...I think I am going to need it!

I think I have seen it all

Because I saw these at Wal-Mart today:

Now, I love a dog, but COME ON!!!

I TOLD You My Kid's A Star (and he likes chocolate)

The BLF did a dance for his teacher today. I'm sure that was quite a spectacle. And I know he likes chocolate because he bit a *chocolate* kid today. WTF??? Save him a seat on the short bus!

I Know My Kid's a Star

Well, that is to say that I know the BLF will be good at something. However, right now I think that involves being a short bus ridin', window lickin' poo-flingin' moron. I love his imagination, but sometimes it needs to take a break so that real cognitive abilities can develop. As much as I love him, he can seriously fuck up a fuck up.

"I'm Not Wild"

I was driving while my dear friend Kim was holding a cake she had to deliver.

Kim: "I don't think I have ever ridden without my seatbelt on."
Me: "Never?"
Kim: "No! I feel like I'm not wearing a shirt!"
Me: "You've never ridden without a seatbelt on???"
Kim: "I'm not wild Julie!"
Me: [hysterical] "I am going to put that on my blog."

And there you go. Love ya Kim!

Chocolate

JT is starting soccer tomorrow. We were talking about it at dinner tonight and he asked me if his coach was a "chocolate" guy like in his soccer book. I told him no, that his coach was like him and then I asked him what kind of guy he was. He said he was a "gray" guy. I was so hoping he would say vanilla!

Mother of the Year

It is only April, but I am already willing and able to accept this award. My performance today makes me a shoe-in for this honor. When BB and I went to our happy place, I had to use the potty. After doing so, I decided to change BB as well. I then realized that although I had the 'diaper' bag, I had NO diapers. They were in the car. I really didn't want to load up and drag us all back out to the car, so I did what any mother of the year would do. I took her diaper off, scooped the poop out, flushed the poop, wiped her bottom and put the same diaper back on. Please hold your applause. Although this gets me top honors, it is after all, only April. There is SO much more where this came from!

A Day In The Life

I think I am becoming a freebie whore! A new GFS Marketplace opened nearby on Monday and in the circular yesterday I saw that they were giving away 'stuffed' hot/cold shopping bags to the first 100 people in the door beginning at 8:00 this morning. Well, I set my plan in action. I was thinking I would drop BLF off at school by 7:30 and of course get the obligatory diet coke from McD's. Well, I also had to consider what/how to feed BB in the meantime. I decided to get her pancakes at McD's and feed her in the car. I thought I would have plenty of time to wait in the parking lot at GFS. That was NOT the case. When I approached at 7:49 AM, the parking lot was full and there was a line through the middle of it. I hightailed it out of the car, put BB in the stroller in her carrier, grabbed the pancakes and got in line. So, there I was in line, in a parking lot, before 8:00 trying to get free shit. WTF?? Really, I am asking again...WHO AM I?? Sometimes I really just crack myself up. Well, I barely squeaked in...I was number 95!! WOOOHOOOO! I was pretty excited because I have wanted a bag like that for quite a while. I almost asked for one for the baby too, but I'm not THAT greedy! There are days when I simply amaze myself. Oh, and I got some cool stuff in the dollar bins at Target too...I'm a 'Crap for a Dollar' whore too.

You Wanna A Piece of Me

This morning, at 6:30 when I was getting out the shower the BLF comes into my bathroom wearing a football helmet and carrying a football.

BLF: You wanna piece of me?

Me: What?

BLF: YOU wanna a piece of me?

Me: Did you just ask me if I wanted a piece of you?

BLF: Yes.

Me: Pick up the phone and call daddio so we can both laugh our asses off!

Real Housewives of NYC

I can't wait to watch it tonight! I never in my life thought I would consider the OC gals to be down to earth, but I certainly do after seeing this group of bitches!

Here We Go Again

We just returned home from a trip to SC to visit with my parents and Mary (hi MaeMae!) and wouldn't you know my effin' grandmother (Mema...NOT Memawwwww) was put back in the hospital again. Where in the hell is the grim reaper?? He certainly is not with her! She has pneumonia....again. She has only been out of the hospital for 2 weeks from a stay that kept her there over a month. While there the first time she contracted the MRSA staph, had double pneumonia, and yeast infection and HERPES...all in her lungs....but no, she is still bitching...I mean kicking. This is my maternal grandmother and my mom is an only child. She treats my mom like crap and acts like a spoiled child and has some overblown sense of entitlement. Oh, and she is scared to death of dying. Thankfully, I think, that if she does not die, this will be her ticket into a nursing home. I know I seem insensitive. My grandmother has always been good to me. But, now that I am older I can see the whole picture very clearly and I have a hard time tolerating her shit. And coincidentally, something always happens to her when my mom and I are spending time together. She was put in the hospital last time the day after we left for Florida for our cruise and LJ was with my mom.
On another note, my dad is running for county council. I have mixed feelings about this for him. I wish him the best, but I feel like he is adding to what is an already very full plate. Oh well, just more to complain about, and that he can do!

Bargain Shopper

I never really used to look at food ads at different stores and then plan a shopping list. I still don't price match at Wal-Mart, which I should. But recently, I have gotten into looking at the weekly Kroger and Publx ads and paying special attention to sale prices and price per ounce. So I saw where Kroger is doing a mix or match sale and went in yesterday to take advantage. They had Dole fruit cups (4pk) 2 for $4, which I thought was a good deal, so I got 3 packs. They also had some Motts organic applesauce on closeout for $1.42 for a 4pk, because it expires at the end of this month. The original price was $2.85. I purchase said items and then go to Publix. They had the Dole fruit cups BOGO. I was mad that I had already bought them, but I didn't want to buy them again. When I got in the car I started to examine the Kroger receipt and realized that I had been charged $2.85 for the applesauce, which I bought 2 packs of. I normally don't pay this close attention, but I will from now on. I was still mad about the Dole fruit too, so I decided to bring the items back to Kroger this morning. I went to CUSTOMER SERVICE and the first thing I asked was "Do you price match?" What in the hell do you think the response was?? I certainly didn't expect "Not that I know of." Um, excuse me, not that you know of. You are working in customer service aren't you? If you don't know then who the hell does? So I told dimwit that I wanted to return the fruit and that the applesauce was on closeout, but scanned incorrectly. She actually had to go check the shelf, which really perturbed me...like I would drag my bag of food, my baby and myself back in there for nothing. Long story longer, I got $11 back and got to keep the applesauce because you get an item for free if it scans incorrectly. But I am still shit out of luck on some packs of fruit because the Publix sale ended yesterday. But that's ok....I'm watching you!!!!

On an only interesting to me note, I did take advantage of Harris Teeter triple coupons last weekend and saved over $50 with just the coupons I had alone. I seriously keep staring at the receipt because it makes me so happy. Why God, why??

Really?

Is this necessary??

Party Time

We attended 2 birthday parties this weekend. David had his 4th birthday party on Saturday at a place called "Train Up A Child". It is a Thomas store with a party room and train tables. Kim did an excellent job on his cake (check out her blog) and her fruit arrangement and cookies were really good too. JT had fun, but was tired because he woke at 5:30 that morning and opened the "childproof" gate and came on out. WTF?? We bought this thing because it is almost 4 ft tall and mounts to the wall and has a walkthrough gate that takes two hands to operate!!!! He came to me at 6:00 after taking a crap saying he needed wiped...I said "not now". We have since bought a cabinet zip lock to lock the freaking gate!

Sunday we went to Toby's 2nd birthday party. It was at the Discovery Center in Murfreesboro. It was a lot of fun too. The pics below are from there.

Blog Lazy

I've just been so lazy lately...not wanting to do anything! I hate feeling that way. I was watching an episode of Whose Wedding is it Anyway? on Style Friday night and made a mental note to blog about it. Ok. First of all, I am not sure this show should be on the Style channel. Of course it is not called the *good* Style channel, so I guess there is my first clue. One of the couples, from Miami, was planning an Asian/Disco themed wedding. Huh?! And they actually found a planner that would do that, but it could have something to do with the $80,000 budget. Mind you that neither the bride or groom was Asian or John Travolta. Although the groom busted out in the white disco suit with black shirt for their *surprise* disco wedding dance. The other couple was in Atlanta and they were having a "Heaven on Earth" themed wedding in their warehouse church where their reception budget was $6,000. That would be why poor Jeffery Blooms (I can't even believe they had the balls to ask him with that kind of budget, but he agreed!) had to resort to using baby's breath for entire arrangements. The bride's headpiece looked like a headdress with dangle beads on her forehead. Her bridesmaid dresses were pink and orange, which I somewhat like, however I do not like that color combination on the bride's eyelids...and oh, yes, it was there. I forgot to mention that the groom is pursuing a career as a stand-up comic while being a barber during the day and he and the bride are both studying to be ministers. I am sure most people would say "to each his own", but not me. I think I am done with the criticisms for now, but I have no doubt there will be more to come on some other subject!

PS...I did forget to mention that the bride in Atlanta serenaded her groom as she was walking down the aisle.

Now where will I get my manue?

I guess these people got tired of getting harrassed!! Thanks alot Mary!!