Happy Halloween

It's For a Good Cause

I am going to run the Dunkin' Donuts 5k tomorrow in support of the T.J. Martell Foundation. Anybody want to pay $35 for a t-shirt and lunch and join me?

Hulk Smash

J.T. got these Hulk gloves after his "almost" endoscopy. LJ loves them. They were so cute playing together!

Smooches and Hippos

Yesterday when I picked J.T. up from school his buddy came and gave him a hug. J.T. hugged him back and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Then he looked at me and said "I gave him a kiss." I just said, "You might not want to do that." Now, I don't care that he did that, but I don't want anybody going crazy about it at school and all the drama that would ensue. How sad is it that that was the first thing that crossed my mind?!

As we were driving home this evening we were watching an animal DVD in the car. J.T. said "Hippos have big bellies and big penises." I really can't argue with that.

To Single Parents

Bless.Your.Heart. I don't know how you do it. Making up for Darrell's slack while he is out of commission is wiping me out. Plus, I have to take care of him too. There is a reason why I don't have 3 children. Two is P.L.E.N.T.Y. for me! And now I have a 3rd, an almost 35 year-old, who listens and communicates worse than our 15 month old. At least when the little ones need or want something, they ask or cry or whatever....and when they don't want something they yell, or cry. I am wiped out. I hate giving kids a bath. I am tired of being a chauffeur (this really doesn't have anything to do with Darrell). Darrell really does a lot around here, things that I don't think about, or usually don't HAVE to think about. I really appreciate what a great husband and father he is!!! Now, he just needs to get that damn shoulder better (yesterday) so we can get on with our NORMAL lives (whatever that is)!

Anyway, after that rant, I admire all you single parents. Being a parent is hard work. Period.

Say What?

J.T. said 'penis' at school today during a project. I don't know why, or in what context.

So?

He got a moved from a green face to a yellow face for it. Really? Is that necessary?

To My Fellow Nominees

It is such an honor to be nominated for this award among such good company. I know many of us were anticipating winning the Mother of the Year 2008 award, and as much as I would like to be humble and say that I can't believe that I actually won, well, I really knew it was in the bag all along.

I really need to thank my children for making this honor possible. Without them, obviously I wouldn't be a mother, and I wouldn't have been able to be recognized for my outstanding mommy moments. Let's revisit my list of outstanding accomplishments:

• Leaving the house with LJ and not bringing more diapers. She pooped and I dumped the poop in the toilet, wiped her butt and put the same diaper back on.
• Driving out of my neighborhood and forgetting to buckle JT into his carseat.
• JT swallowed a quarter that landed us in the hospital 3 weeks later. Two weeks after that we were back at the hospital to have it removed because it was still in his stomach. Thankfully it had passed before he got in for surgery.
• Sending JT to school wearing pants that were too short and too tight around the waist and the button kept popping open.
• Bringing Lily June to the fountains in her walker, where she walked OVER the fountain spraying from the ground and was nearly launched to the moon, walker and all.

And the number thing that made me a shoe in for this award:

• Going to the grocery store with Darrell and Lily June Saturday. While there, I let LJ walk. She was getting down on the floor and I pulled her up by her hand. I pulled her elbow out of socket, but I am so wise that I knew it was nurse maid's elbow (because the same thing happened to JT when he was her age and we didn't know what had happened and we went to the ER where we were put in the crazy people room so we could be watched) called her dr. and we headed to Green Hills so they could pop it back into place.

I cannot thank you all enough for this prestigious award. I will definitely be trying equally as hard next year NOT TO WIN!

I Never Said I Wasn't Judgmental

There were some interesting "people" at the ambulatory surgery center yesterday. It was a really busy place with a really full waiting room. The room wasn't cramped, but it wasn't exactly spread out either. One man was hacking up a lung. His name was called and I thought he was the patient, the way he was walking. Turns out he and his son were there for his wife. When he stood up he had to get his balance and the way he was standing there, he looked like he was about to puke. He and his son got his wife to the nurse and proceeded to tell her that they were going outside to smoke. Great. He was also a mouth breather...I really don't think he closed his mouth the entire time. When he started hacking, Darrell and I at the same time said "For the love of god" outloud. Then, a "lady" and her daughter came in. The mom was there for surgery, on her finger. She was wearing "Family Guy" Stewie pajama bottoms, a Mayberry t-shirt and vans type shoes with funky laces. She was also carrying a huge Elmo, that was at least 3 feet tall. As she and her daughter were sitting across from us, they were sharing and i-pod, they each had a bud in one ear. Then, the mom started playing with her tongue stud. The daughter had to get on that I suppose and started showing hers as well. Delightful, mother/daughter tongue studs. Dad must have been parking the car because his entrance was a bit delayed. He looked like he needed to be holding a sign at the Bell Rd. Exit. It was just a weird dynamic all the way around. People watching brings me so much pleasure, and disgust all at the same time.

Now, I know not everyone has the same opportunities, or even the same cares and concerns. These are just my observations

Holy Crocs Batman!

Yesterday, while Darrell was in surgery, I went down the street to have lunch. After lunch, I decided to walk along West End Ave. and window shop. I was on the phone with Kim and as I was walking by f.y.e. I noticed a display of kids' crocs in the window with a sign that said "75% off All Crocs and Jibbitz". WHAT??? So I took Kim on a phone shopping spree with me, and bought 8 pairs of crocs and 16 jibbitz! They had Lightning McQueen, Batman, Spiderman, Mickey Mouse, Cinderella, Ariel and Supergirl. I cannot tell you what kind of high I get off of a good deal! The crocs were 7.50 a pair and the jibbitz were .75. I was very excited...it was one of the first things I told Darrell after his surgery! I get really excited when I see the the little red stickers on items at Target too...it is the biggest rush!!!

I Think I Can

We are at the ambulatory surgery center waiting on Darrell's surgery to begin. I know, I haven't mentioned it, but he is having shoulder surgery today. I am so happy I brought my laptop and that I can get online!! I am glad he is having surgery, hopefully no more pain. I am a little concerned about the caretaking part, as that is usually his job (to take care of me...as I have had 4 surgeries!). My philosophy has always been "I'm not your mama!" But, he is always so good at taking care of me, sick or not...I think I can return the favor! Thanks Kim and Chris for watching the kids! I will keep everyone posted! Yeehaw for internet freedom!!!

Wordless Wednesday

I Can't Make This Shit Up

Literally. We were at church Wed. night and we had just finished eating. I was talking to a lady I don't even know, telling her that her daughter is so sweet and did a wonderful job singing with her boyfriend a couple of weeks ago. J.T. was standing right behind me and kept hiding under the hood of my jacket. The lady says "Oh, I think somebody has a poopy." And then I had to reply, "No, I think J.T. is just passing gas because he NEEDS to go poopy." So, he and I take off to the kiddie potty. Well, I take off and he gets mad at me for pulling him and wants to walk very slowly, in order to, ahem, keep matters contained, if you will. So, we get to the little crapper and he definitely has a peek-a-boo turd. He does his business while I go get the ever important wet wipes. O.M.G. He seriously dropped a LOG. Before we wiped, I tried to flush the little potty, to no avail. His freakin' turd was TOO BIG for the little potty. S.E.R.I.O.U.S.L.Y. Okay people, I am not a member of this church. I attend fairly regularly but I don't "know" things. I was not sure what I was supposed to do. I had stepped out into the hall to look for help when the lady that always works the nursery on Sundays walked by. I told her that his poop was literally too big to flush and that I was going to need a BAG TO GET IT OUT! Lord help me! So, she got 2 bags for me and I went to work. That thing was at least 2 inches in diameter. I swear only these things can happen to me. It really wasn't a big deal (never thought I would say that about a situation such as this). J.T. and I had a talk about waiting too long to go potty. I know it is still a little intimidating for him in public, but you've gotta do what you've gotta do.

Oh, the joys of motherhood.

It's My Birthday!

Happy 33rd birthday to me! It has been a nice day. I went on a field trip with J.T. and then LJ, J.T. and I spent the day together. My goodness, that boy DOES.NOT.SHUT.UP. But, all in all, it has been "fabbaless." And here is some advice (thanks to Sheree from RHOA):

"Don't let the shoes own you. You own the shoes."

I know, that is random, but I had to throw that in there!

Thanks to everyone for the wonderful birthday wishes! Don't forget my anniversary on Saturday....11 years!

Word.

Me: Can you not hear J.T.?

J.T.: Can you not be mean mommy?

Um, probably not, but I know you can hear!

Me too!

JT likes to play with the little girl next door. They didn't see each other much this summer, but she seems to be around more these days. Twice now, he has come home crying saying that they won't let him in. The first time, they had been playing, but it was time for her to go in for dinner. He wouldn't listen and her dad basically just had to close the door on him. The second incident was on Sunday, and we aren't really sure what happened. I told him he can't go over there if he is going to cry about it all the time.

So, yesterday, JT was playing with another little boy and the girl wanted that little boy to come to her house and she told JT that he couldn't come to her house. But, the little boy's grandma told him that JT had come over first and that he could play with her after he played with JT. JT and the boy were playing in the sandbox and I suggested to him that he ask the little girl over to play with them. He did, and she came over. While she was here, I asked her if she and JT had had a fight. Her response:

No, sometimes JT is just bugging me too much.

Well, we can't argue with that logic.

I Think It's a Sign

Should I be worried that a Jehovah's Witness came and knocked on my door while I was catching up on "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" this morning?

Just so everyone is caught up, everything in "Uhlanta" is just "Fabbaless."

CYA

Cover.Your.Ass.

One would think that a company that calls itself by an acronym would also be familiar with this one. Notsomuch. The company that Darrell works for is FULL of incompetent IDIOTS. He called Sunday evening to see how things were running and the person who answered the phone was in tears. He asked her what was wrong and she began to tell him that she is being sexually harrassed by one of the supervisors and that another employee witnessed it and had reported it to the corporate office, which told the local HR manager. He told the manuf. mgr. who talked to the supv. and told him to "lay low." THERE WAS NOTHING ELSE DONE...NO INVESTIGATION, NO TALKING TO THE ALLEGED VICTIM, NO DOCUMENTATION. Darrell didn't know anything at all about any of this and the woman works for him. So, he had to go in on Sunday to sit there and he called the two other mgrs. to find out what was going on. The manf. mgr. said yes, he had talked to him, but it had been "a while ago." In the meantime, while Darrell was still en route to the plant, the mfg. mgr. called the supervisor and TOLD HIM WHAT WAS GOING ON and he went and yelled at the accusor. Is anybody following the LOGIC of ANY of this???? Then Darrell had to call the HR mgr to come in, but the mfg. mgr. did not think that was necessary....WTF????? Are you freaking kidding me?????? So NOW, after the SECOND mention of the problem, they are doing interviews. The HR mgr. is afraid they are going to get sued. He damn well should be afraid. What a bunch of fucking idiots! Darrell, who doesn't know anything about HR, knows through common sense, that in 2008, you don't let shit like this slide. Whether it is a false accusation or not is still to be determined, but no matter what, when this kind of information is received, it needs to be researched and DOCUMENTED!!!!!

Seriously, how stupid do you have to be to not CYA???

My Big Redneck Wedding

Who else watches this??? I decided to record it this season so I would be certain not to miss any train wrecks. So far, I have been quite pleased. Anna and Bo, brother and sister, from Verbena, AL got married in episode 101. It was a mud boggin' weddin', with a confederate theme. If you happen to catch this episode, keep your eye out for the "toothless wonder" at the bacehlorette party and at the wedding. She does nothing in particular, but just looking at her is ENOUGH! I am not going to go into more detail on this one. You just gotta watch it.

I also caught one about a couple from Hunker, PA. They had been together for 10 years, had a kid last year and then decided to get married.at.a.demolition.derby. As in...In.the.demolition.derby. They crashed into each other and then got on top of their cars for the ceremony. She was in a actual wedding dress (pretty) and had to climb in through the used-to-be windshield of her pink camo painted derby car. They met by playing in the same pool league. The reception was at the Fire Hall. The groom is a tow truck driver and invited random people that he towed to the wedding.

This stuff just makes me smile in disbelief. I love it!

And the Oscar Goes To....

J.T. Box for his academy award winning performance as "the grandson" at Gamma's house. As gamma was rubbing his head trying to get him back to sleep...

JT: I will always have mommy in my heart. And Darrell and my baby. sighhhhhhhhhhhhh

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

4 words

Shut.The.Fuck.Up.

I'm a Slacker

But that is really not news. Sorry I haven't been keeping up with the blog. I have been lazy, had a bladder infection, a sick husband and JT had bronchitis. Oh, and I brought him to SC last Friday and came back on Saturday, so I have been recovering. I will try to get back on track!